Married? Single? What is My Vocation?

I'm lonely, brothers and sisters.  Like, really lonely.  It's not that I don't have family and friends around.  It's not that I don't have plenty of social interactions with people at work and at home.  And it's not that I feel isolated.  But, I feel a deep longing, and have been feeling it for a while now.  It comes and goes, but it is never gone for very long.  A few weeks?  A couple months?  And then it comes back again, like an old friend.

I'm not unhappy.  I want to get that out of the way.  But, I just have this feeling that something is missing, like I went out wearing shoes, but no socks, or a coat and hat, but no scarf on a crisp winter day.  It's not like I can't function without whatever it is that's missing, but it nags me, it bothers me.  Like, if that thing (scarf, socks, etc.) was here, I would be doing much better, but as it is, I'm doing just fine.

I've struggled with my vocation for years.  As a child, I actually wanted to be a nun.  Then, as I got a little older, I "discovered" boys, and the rest was history.  Only, the thing is...it wasn't.  I mean, I had plenty of gents that I was interested in, but no one really stood out in the long run.  I had one who I thought could go pretty far, and it fizzled out after a couple of years.  Of course, there's nothing wrong with dating around, but I have been looking for something that I'm just not finding, and sometimes I wonder if I'm meant to find it.

Vocations could mean married, single, or vowed religious.  So, single is a big one.  Not everyone is meant to get married.  And that's okay.  But, sometimes, I wonder if that's what God has planned for me.

I'm writing to you, brothers and sisters, to ask that you please pray for me.  And pray for everyone discerning their vocations.  For some, this comes very easily.  I like to say that I always knew my profession.  But, I don't know my vocation.  For others, they know what God is asking of them, but they may or may not want that.  It's understandable, but important to remember that God has plans bigger than anything we could conceive, and He wants us to be happy.  So, sometimes, we have to do things we might not want, because in the long run, things will be better than expected.  So, pray for vocations, that our brothers and sisters can figure out what it is that they are being called to do, and that they may have the courage to do it.

God bless,

❤ Little Sister

All Saints Day

Today, I saw St. Teresa of Calcutta.  And Saint Anthony.  And Saints Joseph, Nicholas, Patrick, and Thérèse of Lisieux.  Before you ask, no I was not hallucinating.  And no, I didn't die and go to heaven.  I was at mass for the Feast of All Saints, watching the children from my parish process up and down the aisles dressed as their patron saints.

When I was a kid, I didn't have a patron saint.  As far as I'm aware, there isn't a saint with my name.  So, we jumped to my middle name.  And I wasn't sure if there was a saint with that name either, so I got to pick a saint whose name was similar to my middle name, and chose St. Margaret Mary.

You don't realize it when you're a kid, but All Saints Day is a really big deal.  When your Little Sister was still pretty little, I remember being so excited to dress up and talk about my saint, but the day was much more than a Catholic variation of Halloween.  For those of you who don't know, Margaret Mary was the one who saw the vision of the Sacred Heart of Jesus.  For more information, you can read about her here.

The important lesson to remember today is that everyone can be a saint.  In fact, it is our duty as Christians to strive for sainthood.  Now, that might sound a bit presumptuous.  I'm going to be a saint someday certainly sounds a little cocky.  But, it's not meant like that.  Rather, we're saying I will strive for God, and to be the best person that I can possibly be, for the glory of His holy name.  What a beautiful thought!

Sainthood is not an impossible goal.  But, it is a difficult one.  The road is a bit rocky at times, and you will encounter opposition, not only from people you know and those you do not know, but from the spiritual realm as well.  Many of the great saints were plagued by demons, but they kept the faith anyway.

What I'm trying to say is that sainthood is not easy, but we can all attain it if we try our very best to stay close to God and to follow His plan for us.  All Saints Day is a yearly reminder of that privilege, gift, and grace.

And for those of you who haven't been to mass yet, don't forget--this is a Holy Day of Obligation, so you have to attend today!